ahhhhhhhh refreshing

Today, totally a refreshing day outdoors. Soooo much cooler then it's been, thank God! And it's breezy outside! So nice!
Been a busy week, with a friend coming into town on Wednesday. We went and saw two shows already, got another one tonight, saturday night and sunday evening have a friend cabaret. I must say, Drowsy Chaperone, cute and entertainment. Didn't care about the two lead characters one bit, but loved the "charperone" and Alfonso and "guy in chair" he was entertaining. He also plays Lex Luthers dad Lionel on Smallville. "Curtains" loved it. David Hyde Pierce was fantastic as was Debra Monk (love her! Want to be her when I grow up!) Fun, cute, entertaining, lots of laughs. Just a good show! Tonight is Company. Not going to be as fun and uplifting as the other shows but should be an interesting concept.
On the health front news, everything seems to be going fine. I got the regular aches from chemo in my chest and shoulders. I also got weird stomach aches, but I believe it's from the gallbladder surgery and them inflating my abdomen with carbon dioxide. I really should ask how big they inflate it. But i'm sure enough that it stretched the ab muscles so now they are trying to get back to normal and aren't very happy to do it. But today the chest aches have left so that's nice!
Also had a little queasy feelin monday-wednesday. Took some Zofran but mine is a nasty fake berry flavor. It's gross and makes me want to barf from the fake flavor. It also leaves a gross sweet taste in my mouth. Yeah it helps in the long run, but that sickly sweet taste is so gross. I'm constantly popping gum or candy or Ice Breaker Sours.
Thats my update for now.
Hope everyone has a great 4th of July!

hot hot hot

Man it's hot and humid outside. yuck!! These are the days I much prefer to stay home with the a/c goin an nappin! But alas, I'm at work. Which actually though is a good thing. Keeps the money comin in. So far no horrible effects from the chemo. Was feelin a little queasy yesterday. Had some soup for dinner and a lowfat chocolate shake that ma made. yummy! and thanks ma! She's the best!
Took a Zofran this morning as i was still feelin a little off. So far so good though. Major issue is that i'm just really sleepy. I'd go home early today but I'm the only one in my dept thats here, so guess I'll stay. It's a quiet day here anyways.
Oh Kelly, no more fights to report at least so far haha. Although I did think a couple was talking about me on the train this morning, but i let it go and just looked at them then looked down and shut my eyes lol.
BTW on hot summer sunny days, it's kind of hard to stay out of the sun in a city that you have to walk everywhere. So I put on my 50SPF sunblock (however i hear rumors that anything over 30 is really redundant). Guess I'll have to go get a big floppy hat and start wearing it.
Hair is still falling out. Seems like a lot more now. Any bets on when I'll just shear it off?? Too bad, I like my hair. I did switch to a 2 in1 shampoo conditioner. Suave I think, and it's a thickening one too lol. My hair did feel nice and soft and looked a tiny bit thicker or just wishful thinking ha! But it does smell good!
The rest of this week will be pretty full. My friend Mike is coming into town and we have a bunch of shows lined up. So far 4 shows, wed, thur, fri and Sat and my friend Andrews cabaret on Sunday. Should all be good and fun, and Andrew, probably raunchy haha! Hopefully won't tucker myself out!!
Well, off to enjoy my salad and then get back to work.
ciao

quickie

This is just a short one. A quickie if you will :)
Wow the steroids really kicked in lastnight. I was awake until 5am. Usually I can read a book and maybe 20-pages in i can fall asleep. Nope not lastnight. I read about 130 and finally was slightly sleepy enough to fall asleep but then still up around 9am. Kind of sucks as I like my sleep. I enjoy it. Oh sad. But now I'm up for the day. Maybe I'll be sleepy later and take a nap.
The tingling has gone down yay. But i have a slight headache. Took a Zofran for nausea lastnight as I felt a little off. But those dissolve under your tongue fake berry things are enough to make you want to puke lol. I feel ok now and since it's been well of 8 hous since i took it I like i'm good.
Well off to get some brunch!!

chemo again and Snap-On altercations

I got my chemo today!! And a special shout out to Kelly who's been deported today yay! hope it went well!
I have to say I'm unlucky to go to chemo with two great nurses Geri and Priscella (sorry if spelled that wrong!). They are very fun and sassy. Much better then sittin some place with nurses who don't want to talk to patients and as someone told, "act like they have sticks up there butts!" lol
Chemo went well. Accessing the port kind of hurt today. Guess I either didn't put enough lidocain on it or it wore off by the time i got there. Or they lied and it really doesn't numb it lol. But i survived. Not horrible, just not pleasant.
After chemo mom and I went and to a Japanese restaurant suggested by Priscella. It was very tasty. We just made it 30 minutes before they closed from lunch to get ready for dinner. Still not used to restaurants just closing at 3 to reopen later for dinner. I'm sure if I lived in Italy or Spain or I guess Japan I'd think nothing of it, but in NY it's a little odd. We both got chicken terriyaki bento boxes, very yummy and a lunch special and cheap! yay! then off we went and saw Evan Almighty. i thought it was very cute and enjoyable. I really liked it, though i hear it got bad reviews. Sure there was a meaning behind it, save our national parklands, work together love each other yadda yadda, but i liked it. and i just really enjoy Morgan Freeman in general but especially as God. Also, I'm really enjoying Steve Carell. I'm not a big fan of The Office but his movies I like!
After the movie we came back to Astoria. Ooooh and I came close to gettin in a fight (slight exaggeration) with some latina on the train lol! There was a guy sittin there and I noticed he had Snap-On racing hat and a Snap-On tshirt. I leaned in to my mom and said he's king of like a logo for Snap-On (or for those who don't know Snap-On is a company that produces tools and I like parts for the automotive industry that "snap"together at least that's what I believe after seeing them be talked about and used on American Chopper once.) Anyways this guy turned to his girl friend and said I hate it when people talk about you, so i said under my breath that its' a lot of logo for Snap-On, then the girl, got all attitude in her and said "WHAT?" So i just looked at her and said I was just talking about Snap-On. Then she got all deflated and sais "oh" then went about takin to her other friend.
we got back in Astoria and went to a small pizzeria, shared some slices. Not really on my lowfat diet though. and now we are home just flickin through the tv. so thats about all. No plans for the weekend. Just gonna chill!

Back to the Lab

Met with the surgeon today who plucked out my gallbladder last week. He said everything looks good. The odd pain i have to the left of everything, it related to one of the incisions and should go away with no worries. So if it were up to him I can go back to chemo. He did say it was good to get the thing out when i did, it was inflamed and fell well between chemo dates so I should only miss one treatment. So since we were near my oncologist office, we walked over there and his receptionist just stuck me on the list in front of other people. I said i could just leave him a message but she put me on the schedule and I got to see him. The verdict is, as long as my liver enzyme function tests come back fine I can get my chemotherapy treatment on Friday. So I went down to the chemo lab and scheduled with them for 11am. Normally it's at 1 but apparenlty only one nurse will be there (normally there's two, it's a small lab in the bldg of the dr's practice) so get me in early before people and out earlier so she can go home lol. Normally takes about 2 1/2-3 hours of being actually hooked up and drippin.
So wished and hopes for good liver enzyme numbers and can finally get back on track.
The rest of the day was eatin some overlly spicey mexican food (my mom even said stuff was spicey and she likes spicey!) then went to a bookstore and got some goodies. Oh i have to be on a lowfat diet for 6 weeks (drs orders ugh) so I got a cookbook a light crockpot cooking book. looks good and easy! We like that! then went home. Long day especially since its hot outside. Not really sure how hot but it was supposed to be around 92 and high humidity. It's definetly humid out there and hot but in the city at least on the east side near the river was nice and breezy. But Queens is hot and nasty lol. So happy to be home as my side was hurting, and now we are back in the nice air conditioning yay!!!
so there ya go!

p.s. here's an interesting article about a chip thats been created that can help cancer treatment
http://www.ctv.ca/servlet/ArticleNews/story/CTVNews/20070619/cancer_chipbreakthrough_070619/20070619?hub=TopStories

Out and About

I made it outside for a little while today. Mom and I walked down to the dinner, down the street and around the corner. Then across to the drug store and back. Nice little outing, but man it's hot outside today, but a breeze blowin.
Watching a very weird movie called Dead Gilr, an independent film. Very odd.
Feelin better day by day but still not sure why i hurt on my left side. I'll have to check that will the doc on my checkup on tuesday. I mean, the gallbladder was in the upper right and got really no pain there at all. Two incisions to the right don't hurt either. The one in my belly button is ok and the one above aches a little but then a couple inches to the left of those is what oddly feels like was strechted and torn muscle. I don't get it, just wish it would heal up. Wanna get back to chemo so i can stop wonderin what the lymph systems doing while I had to skip a treatment.
those are my thoughts and remblings for today.
ciao

My Story

So I figured I probably should share my story kind of from the beginning on here. I have it on myspace.com but not here, so if you're interested here goes.....
At the end of February I switched to a new doctor. When i went for the physical I wasn't actually feeling well, had a bad congested cough. So my physical ended up turning into a regular office visit with a diagnosis of bronchitis and asthma. I also told him that I often had a recurring dry cough but seemed seasonal mostly in April and November but lasting a couple months at a time. He gave me some antibiotics and sent me on my way, making another appt for the physical. I finished the drugs, went for the physical and felt ok. But a couple days later the cough felt like it was coming back. So i went back in to him (meanwhile he had done bloodwork and it all appeared normal) he took a listen, no bronchitis, but sent me for a chest xray because of the history of cough. Also I had a bump (swollen lymphnode) on the left front of my neck which i had gone to a previous dr and told and nothin showed up in the thyroid and it only bothered me when i lifted my arms over my head so she just wrote it off as nothing). anyways the xray showed a mass behind my breastbone, so he called my work office and told me and said go get a CTscan. I dragged my friend with me, drank down that nasty nasty concoction of barium yuckiness and had the scan. When my doc got the results, again called me at work, to tell me that there's a mass in my breastbone, he suspects lymphoma and now i need to call an oncologist and he gave me the number. so I broke down at work, cryin at my desk. Probably scaring people. They tried to calm me, but inside my head, i was just like go away leave me alone, let me have my breakdown! Not that i could actually verbalize that through my sobbing lol. Anywho, i called my mom and she flew up from Mississippi and went with me to the oncologist. We never thought to get a 2nd opinion. It happened so fast and just felt comfortable and confident in the onc that it just never occured to us or at least to me. Everything through march went quite quickly. I had blood tests which all looked pretty normal. I then had a biopsy of the lymphnode in my neck. it was fairly large so they just took it out, ran there tests and on march 27th said i have classical Hodgkins Disease nodular sclerosing type 2A (A because i had no symptoms) The 2 because i had areas in two places above the diaghram that showed the cancer. I had two enlarged nodes in my chest, one behind my thrachea and one in front, two on the left side of my neck (of which one was taken out for the biopsy) and a small one on the right side of my neck.These are all the areas that the PETscan lit up.
So my first chemo was on april 13th. it went fine. That night went out to eat at Uno's i think it was and bought new furniture from jennifer Convertables for my apartment. Which was a good thing as now i'm out on the chair sleeperbed.
I have chemo every 15 days. The 2nd chemo went fine, a little more difficult finding a spot to go in. Also had to get neupogen shot. that was fine till the bone pain hit (ouch!) knocked me out for a day, right in the middle of moving rooms in my apt.Thanks god for my ma as she basically moved most stuff. the third chemo didn't go so hot. got through one back of the DTIC but it took forever, couldn't find a good position of my arm to get the drip going fast enough, then when tryinig to push through the adremyiacin (i'm sure I spelled that wrong, its the A of the ABVD)the cannula looked like it was going to pop out, then we just couldn't get it to drip at all and since I had passed a gallstone earlier that week the liver enzymes were raised. So the doc said stop and come back on monday to try. Came back and tried again, got the other back of DTIC (the D of ABVD) when to do the pushes again and was fine until the nurse tried to get a blood return and nothin would come. she was in the vein but the vein just decided it didn't want to cooperate. So that next friday I had mediport put in. That was crazy. They only sedated me for that i could feel the doctor pushing and it would hurt every now and then adn i'd ask for more drugs and still feel it. The last 10minutes of the surgery i just broke down and cried, a catharsis really, and kept crying for about 10-20 more minutes. But all with the port is fine now. Except no one excpet chemo nurses want to touch it lol,fear of clots and infection which is fine. the 4th chemo went well, used the port and all was good. I just ended up trying to pass more gallstones on a tuesday for 3hours and thursday for 12 hours, so my onc got me in with a good surgeon and that monday (this past monday) got the gallbladder taken out. Hopefully i'll be all healed up so I can get chemo on June 22nd!
so thats my story. I'm healin up everyday, able to get up easier and move around easier, but I'll probably be chillin on monday and tuesday of next week at home too.
so there ya go, thats the news thats fit to print....enjoy!!!

still just chillin

So here I am still just chillin on the sofabed. My butt is fallin asleep from all the sitting. I try to get up and move around but after a while it hurts too much so back to sitting/laying I go. I've realized the Percoset just kind of knocks me out if I have any bit of tired in me.Thats kind of nice though.
It's funny how different my taste is tv is from my mom. she loves the murder mysteries, i love cooking adn reality cooking stuff. So right now Murder She Wrote is on. I don't really enjoy it but my ma likes it and since she's kind of waitin on me hand and foot right now, I'll be nice and let her watch some tv that she wants too.
I have alittle fever happening. 99.8 was the highest it's been. I'm hoping it goes back down tomorrow otherwise gotta call the doc or the nurses and see what they say i should do. And for too much info, i'm really gassy. they said I would be because they fill you up with air during surgery to see the insides better. But sheesh man today it crazy.
My friend Josh dropped by today which was nice. Nice to see him. He showed us pics of his puppy with his back paw all bandaged up from the escalator incident. Poor guy, the wrapping was so much larger then his actual leg. But apparently he's doin well so yay!
We'll feelin a little groggy guess I'll be signin off....

Music music music music

well to copy one of my friends blog ms chemopalooza, i just added a playlist too. So, if you hear music it could be my playlist. Mine is just made up of songs I just thought of to add that I liked. some meaningful in lyric some just fun.
I'm feelin better today yay!! My mom noticed too cause i'm gettin more attitude and not sleeping as much hah! So just a quick little blog for this evening. Oh and if you're on a lowfat diet and are craving brownies, try and find No Pudge Fudge Brownie mix. Those are some darn tasty brownies. And if you can't find it in your stores here's their link http://www.nopudge.com/

Stand up and deliver!

Yay I am able to sit up and get out of bed on my own now!!! yay!!! Still causes pain but ya now, what should i expect since to get the gallbladder out they had to put holes through the ab muscle. But this way my mom doesn't have to keep helping me at odd hours to use the bathroom or whatnot. lol
Givin a little shout out to my friend Josh and his puppy Tlaloc ( not sure if i spelled it right, but it means god of rain). Poor little guy, the puppy not josh hah, got his paw caught in an escalator. ouch!!! but he's ok, they rushed him to the pet ER and got all cleaned up and stitched up. poor little pup.
I know i keep just changin subjects, but thats kinda the way i do things. They pop in my head and i right them so i don't forget about them. See i already forgot what i was gonna type lol
Ohhh the Percoset i think is a wierd little drug. Dulls the pain which is nice but makes my head feel wierd. Kinda spinny. but i guess i'd rather deal with that then all the pain!
Hopefully I'll be all healed up by Friday the 22nd and can resume chemo! Funny to actually want to get back to toxic drugs being pumped into your body but i want the hodgkins cured and need the chemo for that. But on a plus side getting the gallbladder out i don't have to worry about passing or trying to pass stones anymore. whew thats some painful stuff and i'm not sorry to see it go!
So while I'm recouping from the surgery, i'm just watching alot of tv. There's alot of nothing on during the daytime. And very few good movies even on the on demand channels. I love Food Network, but even i have my limits lol.
Guess thats all for now, later gators

Gallbladder no more

Well yesterday, June 11, 2007, I had my gallbladder removed. Had to get it removed because i kept trying to pass gallstones. Every time i would try to pass one, which was very painful, my liver enzymes would go up. Once they went up I'm not really able to get my chemo because it's processed through the liver and if the liver isn't functioning properly then the chemo toxins don't get excreted properly. Thus it was decided (and since i had two attacks within 3 days) that the gallbladder would come out. I was able to be seen by one of the top surgeons (according to my onc) between his surgeries. Then his coordinator fit me into his surgical schedule the next day. I had to be there at 5:30 am, ugh that's early. i think the surgery actually took place around 7:30. the anesthesiologist was very nice and explained everything that she would do, including telling me that i would have a breathing tube inserted (which during my biopsy they never told me but must have happened as i felt the same sore throat and weird sore right corner of my lip). Walked into the operating room, hopped up on the table, they tied me down, i think i made some joke. They liked my personality, then i don't remember anything after that other then trying to wake up post surgery. I was sooooo tired from getting up early i had a hard time staying awake.
Now i'm just in pain. Four little holes across my abdomen plus a missing organ. Not so fun. Got some pain killers. they don't kill it just kind of make it not so bad. Oxycodone (generic of Percoset) And now I'm off to sleep, tired of watching some 80's murder mystery tv movie with Pierce Brosnan lol.

Howdy All to my new blogsite!

Just wanted to say Hi and welcome to my new blogsite. I've been posting my blogs on MySpace and will continue to do so but wanted a place a little more accessible to my peeps and fam that aren't on Myspace. I'll post some of my original posts of my journeys through finding out I have Hodgkins Disease a lymphoma cancer, and beyond.
So welcome one and all. Leave comments if you wish as long as they're not degrading or mean and we shall get along just fine!
san